The Big, Dirty Secret of “Star Wars: The Force Awakens” (SPOILERS)

Han Solo, Luke Skywalker and General (formerly Princess) Leia fucked everything up.

Yes, they did. You may love them as an old Star Wars fan, or be interested in them if this is your first ever, “Star Wars” movie (by the way, welcome to the club), but the big, dark secret of the, “Star Wars” Universe is that all of the events of, “The Force Awakens” stem from that one simple fact. Kylo Ren exists because of them and their failure to take care of him. Han and Leia sent their own son away to Luke as a way of outsourcing the very job they were supposed to do as parents: raise their child in a healthy way. So Luke, in all of their compassion, introduced Kylo Ren to a great power…that he failed to use responsibly. And then Snoke shows up.

It is said by some jaded, “Star Wars” fans that, “The Force Awakens” is not only a cover version of the Original Trilogy, it has a poor excuse for Darth Vader in Kylo Ren. Except that is the entire point, because being a poor excuse for Darth Vader is all that Kylo Ren is trying to be. Kylo Ren is, to put it simply, a giant dork. A dork who thinks that all he has to do to be intimidating is to wear black, don a mask and carry a lightsaber. To use an ugly analogy, he is like that Pick Up Artist you meet on the bar who thinks that all they have to do is repeat the same line but in different ways (and with different drugs) just to get to you…and Rey shows up to prove that they do not deserve to.

Now, is Rey perhaps a bit too competent, not allowed to struggle too much? Well…for at least 2 acts, one can say that, even with Kylo Ren’s behavioral flaws and his wounds in the badass final Lightsaber fight. But in the first act, one sees Rey scavenging from the remains of a lost empire just for scrap, living on small morsels of food, and doing good yet being disconnected from people. Rey may have destiny on her side, but when we first see her, she is in the dumps. Rey fulfills the role of revealing to the viewer just how hollow Kylo Ren’s fearsome appearance really is. I mean, when one is compared to a dork who wears a mask and tries to live up to Vader the way an amateur rapper looks up to Lil Wayne, how can one NOT look like a Mary Sue?

But all of that is just a distraction. When Finn, Rey and Po discuss the legends of Luke, Leia and Han, they do so with wistfulness. They’re earnest in how much they, and their Resistance, are influenced by these three great people. But as any cynical historian can tell you, being a legend is not necessarily the same thing as being true, and the truth is that the people who inspire them are human. All too human. Which is why Han and Leia had a relationship long ago and then went their separate ways. They gave their son away, and then as they plan an infiltration of the Starkiller, they talk of trying to get him back. Get him back? Why would Kylo Ren want anything to do with two parents who were supposed to take care of him, but then outsourced that job to a supposed expert who knows nothing about being a parent (or even a mentor, apparently)?

Luke, Leia and Han, with their negligence and nonsense, have created a monster. And so now Kylo Ren, with the help of a mysterious bad guy who portrays himself as a giant through a hologram, create an imitation of a murderous empire. An empire whose remains they blow into smithereens because they’re convinced that they can do it better.




Speaking of which…I made the following observations while discussing the movie with a friend, and I quote, “Still forming my thoughts…saving it for my blog. It’s basically about how a cult of Empire-worshipers basically turns around and destroys The Old Republic, the very source of their Empire, out of a belief that they are helping The Resistance. It’s the equivalent of Neo-Nazis burning a KKK HQ because they think they’re helping immigrants. Like, in the context of the, “Star Wars”, that’s outrageous, brazen…and kinda fucked. I mean, think on it: Kylo Ren, Snoke the Giant Hologram, and their ilk are going to great pains to replicate the very thing they admire, only they destroy it out of suspicion and hubris. Destroying the model of their own empire, just so they themselves can grow. At least, that’s what I perceived.”


No, seriously, think about that. The Order, as lead by Kylo Ren (who is really lead by Snoke) is basically a group of Neo-Fascists who think that their very inspiration is not fascist ENOUGH. They destroy The Old Republic with a Planet-sized laser cannon because they think they’re helping The Resistance. That’s like if The American Nazi Party did an armed coup on Donald Trump because they thought he was helping Syrian refugees. That’s how fucked up, stupid, brazen and dangerous that is. Phasing out their own heroes so that they can grow as an individual force. Something that Finn, Po and Rey may very well learn that they will have to do, if they want to help The Resistance save the galaxy.

At least, that’s what I perceive. Now if you excuse me, I am drowning in fanart shipping, and memes (No, but seriously, Finn, Po and Rey are just awesome. Awesome characters with awesome chemistry played by awesome actors. Holy shit, did the moviemakers nail that part. It almost makes up for J.J. Abrams last two, “Star Trek” movies. Key word, “Almost”).


This work is licensed under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike 4.0 International License. To view a copy of this license, visit or send a letter to Creative Commons, PO Box 1866, Mountain View, CA 94042, USA.

One thought on “The Big, Dirty Secret of “Star Wars: The Force Awakens” (SPOILERS)”

Comments are closed.